When i thought you were the Moon, when i've lost the Sun.

23 january 09

Dear Diary:

I wake up decided not to attend school, as i got to switch the time on buying new year clothes on saturday to friday. so i woke up, surf the web and do some online chatting before going for a "shopping spree" with a budget of 100 bucks. so went 800plus to buy pants, the uncle was fast to helped me alter the length i wanted. 2 pants for $35. cheap! then went TP library to search for the book that i wanted, because the previous person who loan it, the datedue was on 22, but on 23 that ______ person still not yet return! and 24 is a sat 25 is cny eve..when is he/she is going to return? 28?! i cant help u with the fines. so went tampines mall with jun, i brought him to walked in circles with me, becasue i couldnt find something that i really want to wear for new year. was rather last minute due to sch work and some shit management i have. so bought another pants at 77th street for $49.90 and a shirt from freshbox $36.90 and a yellow tee from duno what shop for $12. initially wanted polo tee but didnt have my size, due to the so last minute? anyway i spent a total of $133.80 for everything =D was another sense of accomplishment, to purchase everything within the time limit and my acceptable budget.. last year spent 2xx? so ya. however because we were walking in circles.. i saw _____ who i shouldnt be seeing but i wanted to see. so i saw _____ on the 2nd floor when i was at the 3rd floor.. so as i was proceeding down to the 2nd floor, i thought i saw the wrong person, or _____ has gone to somewhere else. i was wrong, i saw _____ walking towards my direction! a glance and ignored! not a smile nor a hi. that glance was neccesary, unless u told me u look behind while u walk infront. its terrible, because i cant cry to my mother and say, "mummy its over" once was like never enough, so i went to the 2nd floor to wait for brando to eat.. so when _____ goes up, will eventually goes down.. so i saw _____ again -.- this time, i doubt _____ saw me, or rather didnt want to see me anymore. maybe God has a reason, so that this would happened.

Velonica - Aqua Timez

2:06 AM
it continues to stain, why?.

okay, to reduce confusion and minimise understanding, the next post is going to be different from the other post that happened on 23 january 09.
so this post is going to be about what's happening from 12 jan - 22 jan. first up, thank goodness datelines were extended due to chinese new year, and other admin stuffs in sch..i plot my p1 perspective on 1 monday kay! was a great accompishment, since i last plot any perspective. i also attend sch regularly that week, and finished up alot of things that i last left with. i also learn alot during lecture and field trip, but i didnt attend regularly. wondering am i still fit to become a designer.. put that aside, my friend was terminated for some stupid reason.. that place has turned into hell and not paradise when i can no longer have any food i want, come as and when i like and enjoy working like in the past. got another terrible screening past few days.. without clothes this time, are they dumb or waht ?! to me, till now i still didnt believe they are real, because their actions and words seems superficial. you took out your pass to show who? you wanted to provoke my friend? so he could beat u, so u got a reason to bring him back, when we were just talking at small mac.. and those bowlshit stuffs about its chinese new year so we dun lock u up if not we can bring u back now -.- o, and i bought my new year clothes like today, and i bought everything before the target time, and this year's budget do exceed but was acceptable.. its been very long since i played L4D and its been damn long sinced i played with the usual 4. okay, stay tuned to the next post. i know life was never easy.

1:54 AM
it continues to stain, why?.

I have 24 hours a day, I am sure I will be able to cope with everything. "So when you're feeling kind of mixed up, just remember it's a mixed up world. And if you're feeling life is just too tough, just remember you're a real tough girl." Take control girl! Take control! I'll make it work! Make it work!!
okay, i am not a girl, because i took it from somebody's blog. name defintely is private. got to keep that person's privacy. anyway, i got helped from her.. and i really thankful and appreciate for her help. however i know my limits, i couldnt do everything and anything to help her.. she's facing something, something so tough that i might not be able to. i am not sure will she cope it this time, but i want to believe she can. because the phrase that i copied out, told me she can. and she can.
so since she can, why cant i right? ya, everyone will faced their own problem. and i came out a conclusion years ago that, when u deal with a problem this big, another problem with a bigger issue will come after u have deal with that previous problem.. alright, mine came.. keep coming. maybe i always complain was because i need a break. i am someone who doesnt like to work hard, but will if i am needed.. but sometimes didnt really quite sure the timing. conclusion i want to enjoy life. alright i just cleared my p1, which i should have done it weeks ago. i felt ease, thanks joo for the help, maybe prayers.. i duno, that i would be able to recover from some illness, i 've never experience before and the "uncompletable" p1.. i will make full use of 09 and kick those increadible's butt. the new RGM that i didnt really like, was sacastic. of course i am trained to be a cashier, and well trained for your info.. i terribly mistaken that upside-down note kinda problem, was because i didnt done that before..however people do need eat to get strength right? i hope u give me and the rest food, like whoever that can eat.. or whatever, and not throw them away, instead of giving us.. i'll see how u survive in TMPH, while i will only work the most once per week. okay, its been a week since sch open, and i am adapting to it, while ignoring practically.. incorrect, practical. anw, i got a new eye candy.. IAD eh? the course that i wanted to go.. too bad, we are not fated in that sense. as for LJ, i should calm down since 010109, because its not the first time i am facing the same situation.. but i still hope to get an explaination from you. i will still keep that pen, and try very hard to prevent that pen from losing, becasue thats the remaining link between us. i hope to continue keeping that sense of belonging, because i didnt want to lose you but had to. new year, new surrounding, new people, new expectation, new changes. engsing is not going to lose, he will be strong enough to continue his single life! i believe. totally.

4:49 AM
it continues to stain, why?.

its school later, and i couldnt sleep due to the illness, so came to blogging... since i couldnt get to talk to someone so late right?. okay i've picked up myself for the new year, in terms of career and studies. however for relationships, maybe i should put them aside, since that thing came happening. as for the new year thingy, i would like to add another one, i will eat apple everyday: to keep myself healthy and not fall sick ! its really terrible kay, to fall sick on the 3rd jan. with you wishing me, with you communicate with me, with you cheer me. should i be thankful or doubtful. please dun conclude things easily, practical peoples. need advisor who are single and is so strong in living their life right now! because i seriously need to get this "i must be in a relationship" mindset off my mind, since i couldnt care less about the 4 years cruse; conclusion i may be attached after the 4 years cruse. lets believe, i will be wiating for you 4 years later!

帶我走dai wo zou,daiwozou - 楊丞琳rainne yangchenglin,yangchenglin,rainne

2:48 AM
it continues to stain, why?.

Truth - Arashi
okay so its new year three days ago.. in the new year, i have got to jog bedok reservoir once per week, work 1 of the weekend and get myself a faithful, sensible girlfriend? beautiful! okay i am not that great to suit with that kind of person.. had been playing left4dead the past few days, ended up getting sicked. its the first time, i am experiencing cold and hot at the same time, a high fever? of 38.8 degree celsius? continuous banging of the head, and shivering from head to toe, all the time. wth, and i fall sick at the right time -.- i have to rush my p1, while the plotting room, was shut.. well i fail my p1? its isnt fair to request for additional time, when i have 3 full weeks, 2 to be exact.. like real i would say taht.. o CDS, i forgot to select -.- what else, u also left me just like that, without telling? alright maybe u dun have to tell.. its me who got to tell, and was slow during the process. so i have to permanently say goodbye to u ? which i hate it to the core.. i so so seriously want to break that curse la, 4 years more -.- i thought it was dengie fever, o my the brain was hurt due to the heat.. could even spell it right. if it is, then i would have ended my life? if its not, how am i going to survive? its a long day for 5th jan, will i be able to make it ? and that dream was real.. i guessed you probably didnt believe it. the last time: 26dec08

2:58 AM
it continues to stain, why?.